I had a sense of ease
when I saw the light was green.
No cars coming
a smooth left turn
tap brakes turn wheel
a gentle lean begins.
A slick spot under my wheels
why there? Why my wheels?
The back wants to pass the front
the front wants to point at other cars.
This all started right
and gently quickly went wrong.
I nudge the wheel the other way and pray.
it was just a spot
just one slick spot
that I passed quickly
then all went wrong
but soon was put back right.
A moment later
at the next red light
breathless.
This poem was posted for the previous week’s poetry prompt, Spaced Out. I’m interested to know if the spacing added or subtracted from your experience of reading this poem.
Poetry Prompts and Poems 
I’m beginning to like spaces a lot! With regards to your poem, why do you use spaces in the first few lines? It goes against the sense of ease. I think it might be more effective to use spaces after ‘brakes’ or ‘slick spot’ in juxtaposition to the initial sense of ease. I very much so like the use of spaces in the latter part of the poem and feel it adds to the poem. The theme, driving and traffic lights, is perfectly chosen for the Spaced Out challenge. I’ll come back to the Spaced Out challenge. No doubt about that!
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Thank you for the comment on that. The spaces are intended to create a sense of tension, so I see what you mean about creating tension at the beginning when it starts with “a sense of ease”. I am truly grateful that you took time to give me some critical feedback. Future versions of this poem will definitely incorporate what you observed.
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Only change things, if that feels right for you. I’m always quite ‘out there’ when it comes to criticism and hope it comes across as constructive – which is what it’s intended to be. I mean, hey, who am I to criticize anyone’s work?
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Who are you? Well, I have always enjoyed writing poetry as something for me, and only recently I have been posting my poetry in hopes of entertaining others. So, now I wonder about the reaction, if any, a reader will have. That makes you an important person to me when you are willing to share your reactions. I guess what I’m saying is thank you for being you, I will always welcome your reactions and, of course, decide for myself what my reaction to that will be 🙂
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I enjoyed reading this and agree with Britta’s observation that the spacing is at odds with the “sense of ease” in the beginning. Nicely done, though!
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Thank you. This one was fun to write, and I love getting the feedback.
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